Can God Really Forgive Me?

Sarah Annie Schneider: you Welcome to the Addicted to God podcast. I'm your host, Sarah Schneider, and I am addicted to God. This is a place where we journey together toward the abundant life that God has for us. Freedom from the chains of harmful addictions, worldly strongholds, and all the temporary things that never give us lasting peace. God is the one and only healthy addiction, and this podcast exists to help you and everyone you love fall deeper, more intimately, and personally more in love with God. I'm not a Bible expert, a theologian, or even a seminary graduate. I'm definitely not a polished spokesperson with fancy credentials. I'm a flawed, imperfect girl who loves God and loves people, especially people who are hurting, feeling helpless, or walking through a season of hopelessness. Is that you? Do you want to know God? Do you desire a real personal relationship with Him, but you're just not quite sure where to start? That's exactly why the Addicted to God movement was born. Women I've mentored have looked at me and said, I want God in my life, I just don't know where to start. And I've been there. I've been right there too. Because of what I've seen God do in my life and in the lives of so many others, this podcast is my outpouring of gratitude for everything He's rescued me from. My mission is simple. Help as many people as possible find God and truly know Him. Whether you're fighting your own battles or loving someone who is, Maybe you're simply craving Him more. My prayer is that this episode reminds you that God isn't just a solution. He's the addiction worth having. Today, I'm bringing to you a parable that I turn to over and over. The story I reach for every time a woman in jail that I'm mentoring or in a support group, and they look at me and say, Sarah, I don't think God can ever forgive me for what I've done. When I hear those words, I know they've hit a spiritual rock bottom, not the physical one that most recovery circles would talk about, but that moment when you realize that your choices and consequences have taken you far from God, so far that you can't even imagine that you're worthy of His forgiveness. That feeling like God has given up on you, abandoned you, or that you're no longer deserving of His love. That feeling is honest. It exposes the deepest pain and regret. But I'm here to tell you that it is also a lie. A straight up lie from the enemy of your soul. Today we're going to expose that lie and replace it with the truth. Before we start, I have a question for you. Actually a couple of questions for you. Where is your heart today? Are you eager to know God more? Are you discouraged in life? and tired of trying to fix it by yourself? Have you quietly wondered if you've gone too far for God to still want you? For nearly 20 years, I have been teaching Bible studies and just in the last 10, I've been changed forever by mentoring women who are incarcerated. When they first sit across from me, the desperation is so real, you can just feel it. They look me straight in the eye, tears. running down their cheeks. Sarah, I have messed up my life beyond repair. I need Jesus. I need Him badly. I don't just brush that off. I lean in and gently ask, why? Why Jesus? What makes you think He's the answer? And almost every single time, the answer sounds the same. I grew up in church. My mom or my grandmother dragged me to church every Sunday. They prayed over me nonstop. But in high school, I ran away with the wrong crowd. I left it all behind. Now I see, I wish I would have listened. Hindsight really is brutal, isn't it? We chase the highs, relationships, the money. We're looking for the approval, thinking that any of it will finally fill us. We make choices that feel right in the moment, only that we wake up one day empty, ashamed, and in a place we never signed up for. For these women, it's jail. Does this sound familiar? That's exactly the story Jesus tells in Luke 15, the parable of the lost son. I ask you to pull out your Bible or open up your Bible app. As I read Luke 15, starting at verse 11 in the NIV version, Verse 11 starts with, continued, There was a man who had two sons. The younger one said to his father, Father, give me my share of the estate. So he divided his property between them. Not long after that, the younger son got together all he had, set off for a distant country, and there squandered his wealth and wild living. After he had spent everything, There was a famine in the whole country and he began to be in need. So he went and hired himself out to a citizen of that country who sent him to the fields to feed pigs. He longed to fill his stomach with the pods that the pigs were eating, but no one gave him anything. When he came to his senses, he said, how many of my father's hired servants have food to spare and here I am starving to death. I will set out and go back to my father and say to him, Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son. Make me like one of your hired servants." So he got up and went to his father. But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion for him. He ran to his son, threw his arms around him and kissed him. The son said to him, Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son." But the father said to the servants, quick, bring the best robe and put it on him. Put a ring on his finger and sandals on his feet. Bring the fattened calf and kill it. Let's have a feast and celebrate. For the son of mine was dead and is alive again. He was lost and is found. So they began to celebrate. Jesus paints this picture so vividly. younger son walks up to his dad and basically says, give me my inheritance, I'm out. He takes off, blows every penny on wild living, hits rock bottom in the famine and ends up feeding pigs and starving. But in verse 17, he came to his senses, it says. He remembers his father's house where even the servants were better off than he is. So he rehearses his speech. Father, I have sinned against heaven and against you. I am no longer worthy to be called your son. Make me one of your hired servants." This is where you might be right now, living in that proverbial pig pen. That speech he's rehearsing is actually what you're saying when you think you've messed up so badly that a relationship with God seems impossible. And here's the most powerful part to me. When he says, I have sinned against heaven and against you, But that, my friends, is a confession. A confession is openly admitting to God that you have sinned, telling Him that your thoughts, words, actions, or even attitudes are wrong and contrary to His holy standard. It's not just saying, I did something bad. It's humbly agreeing with God, declaring, you're right, Lord, I was wrong. I know I broke your heart. So when the sun returns and confesses, Look at what the Father does in verse 20. While he was still a long way off, his father saw him and was filled with compassion and ran to his son and threw his arms around him and kissed him. He ran in a culture where grown men with dignity don't run. But this father's spirit, full of love, no lectures, no I told you so, just pure embrace, restoration, robes, rings, a feast. and zero condemnation. That is the picture of our God. Every single time we turn back, He's already watching for you. He's already running. That my friend is our God. Every single time we turn back, He's already watching for you. He is ready to run to us when we run back to Him. I watch this parable come alive when I share it with people that God puts in my path. People see themselves in the pig pen. They feel the hunger. The shame, the unworthiness. But the moment they choose to get up and head home, even trembling, even doubting, the Father meets them with open arms. Is that hitting home for you right now? It does for me. Maybe your pig pen is in a jail cell. Maybe it's an addiction that's controlled you, past regrets, broken relationships that you caused, or years of just quietly running from God. The ache feels the same. I'm not where I want to be. Right? Here's the truth that changes everything. God wants you back. He is waiting patiently, lovingly waiting for your return. So how do we actually come home? How do we trade our old addictions for being fully addicted to God? The Bible gives us a clear grace-filled roadmap. It starts with a real repentance. Not a fake or superficial, I'm sorry, or I'll try harder. It's a complete 180 degree turn. Acts 3.19 says, repent then, turn to God so that your sins may be wiped out, that times of refreshing may come from the Lord. Then we confess it all, no filters. 1 John 1.9 promises, If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. Come, Messy, it's okay. He already knows every detail. Bring it to Him and watch Him cleanse and renew you. Next, seek Him with everything you've got. 2 Chronicles 7-14 tells us, If my people who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and even turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven and I will forgive their sin and will heal. Practically day to day, can look like this. Crack open your Bible, even if you start small with a Psalm or even a few verses in the gospels, Matthew, Mark, Luke, or John, excellent places to start. Let his word become your new obsession. Then pray, pray raw and pray real. Just lay it out to God. I'm empty. I need you. Help me. Or spill everything out onto the pages of a journal. That's what I do. He's not shocked. And then worship Him in surrender. Amy Grant wrote a song called Better Than a Hallelujah, and it says it so perfectly. I just want to paraphrase a couple of the lines. God loves a lullaby in a mother's tears in the dead of night. The drunkards cry. And when we pour out our miseries, God hears a melody. Beautiful the mess we are. The honest cries of breaking hearts are better than a hallelujah. Songs like this move me because they show just how good God really is. And when we realize how merciful and loving He is, We can't help but worship Him, thank Him, praise Him. And even when feelings aren't there, we do it and it gets us there. And you know what else helps? Getting into a community of other broken, imperfect, messy people that are working through it all with you. That you will find at a church. And when you do find that church, you can join a small group or join small support group or incurred or with other people who will encourage you along your journey. A circle of true friends who won't influence you or tempt you with things that are actually going to keep you from God. Here's the promise that melts every lie. God is not mad or distance. Joel 2 13 calls him gracious and compassionate, slow to anger and abounding in love. When we return to Him with our whole heart, He doesn't just forgive us, He restores, He refreshes, and He throws a party in heaven over you when you return home. No distance is too far, no failure is too big. The Father, our Father, God in heaven is standing at the gate, scanning the horizon, ready to run to you, just waiting for you to take that first step. Friend, if this is stirring something deep inside of you, if the Holy Spirit is whispering, come home. Don't wait another minute. I'm gonna say a prayer right now and I invite you to pray it with me. Or pause and pray your own prayer. Father God, I have chased the wrong things. I have sinned against you and I have hurt others. I am so sorry. I repent. I turn away from that life and I turn toward you. Thank you Jesus who paid it all. Make me addicted to you alone. Help me walk in your freedom from here, Lord. Amen. If you just prayed that prayer, congratulations. God is faithful. I so much appreciate you for listening to this story, digging deep into your own heart to reflect on His goodness. and for spending time with me on the Addicted to God pod. Keep turning toward Him. He is the one and only high that is worth chasing. God's blessing is there for you. May God's blessing pour out on you as you become Addicted to God.